What’s the Matter with Sermons Today?

Advice from Philip Seymour Hoffman

I was recently visited by my insurance man who indicated to me that he was visiting St. John’s because the church he had been going to for the last thirty years had become a bit stale. Even though he socialized with his pastor and called him a good friend, he said that the sermons didn’t seem to be reaching him.

Sermons are an interesting phenomenon. They mean many things to many people. To the minister grinding them out every Sunday, or should I say writing them – they are a constant challenge, a nagging headache and a ticking time bomb. As soon as you are done with one, the clock begins ticking towards the next.

Sermons to others, who listen, can be a moment when a glaze begins to cover your face and from those observing, you look like a deer caught in the headlights. To others, it is a moment to close your eyelids for a moment that seems to move on to many moments. I once asked someone about their eyes being shut while I was preaching and they said that there were just closing their eyes to concentrate and remove the distractions from their surroundings. Hmmm, I’d like to believe that they were telling the truth, but I remain suspicious. To others, sermons are a topic for jokes. Let’s keep it short this time pastor. Pastors are very sensitive when it comes to sermons and often defensive.

One of the great actors of our time is Philip Seymour Hoffman who is currently starring in the Arthur Miller play, “Death of a Salesman.” He once played the lead role in the movie “Doubt” where he was a priest. The film revolves around the question of a priest’s culpability and gives excellent insight into the life in a Roman Catholic parish.

In an interview, Hoffman talks about his own interpretation of the role. He said “I did research by, among other things, going to church. As a kid, I was confirmed and I went to church, but I was bored. Now, I feel the opposite: a good sermon is just theatre. It combines the political scene, the scriptures, and I thought, Hey, I could do it like that. It’s like a teacher getting up and saying, this is the school I come from.”

Hoffman in his own brilliant way makes an observation that is lost on many. Luther often said that the bible is not simply to be read but it is to be proclaimed. A Viva Voce, a living voice that comes alive when it is proclaimed. Yes it is theatre, it’s fireworks, it’s drama, and it is as fresh as today’s news and in the pathos of it all, it becomes good news. It’s too bad that in the daily struggle that we ministers have, a lot of that passion gets lost because the day’s responsibilities, obligations and tasks nickel and dime all of the inspiration out of us.

The Leap Of Faith

Reflections on Jeremy Lin’s Jump Shot

Being the type of person that enjoys culture and everything associated with arts, music and religion, I am of course smiling when it comes to the media talking about being Christian. Often times Christianity is mocked or made fun of as passe. However recently we’ve all been surprised by two athletes who have risen to the front pages of our newspapers. Namely, Denver’s Tim Tebow and the Knicks’ Jeremy Lin.

It’s interesting that the media is making a big deal about the fact that Lin is a Christian. If anybody follows the Knicks, you have had many bruising years of disappointment, upset and even despair. Somehow in a haphazard way, Jeremy Lin rejected by other basketball teams and resigned to sitting on a couch even sleeping there is now given the Knicks one of their longest winning streaks in recent memory. He lights up the court with his once overlooked basketball skills which are amazing everyone. Night after night Lin has been helping the Knicks defeat all competitors and sometimes doing it in the fading minutes of the game.

What I find interesting is that Lin is Asian, he is tall but not by basketball standards (only 6’3”) and he is humble. But the papers are noting something more, namely that his faith has created an appeal too. For example, his success has fired the imagination of Asian American Christians and Christians in China who continue to face varying levels of persecution. Recently, I read that micro blogging messages tend to be very enthusiastic about his faith. “Your physical agility has shown me the glory and omnipotence of God” one internet user wrote. Another blogger wrote “How should young Christians live the life of the Lord?” It appears that Lin is becoming a natural symbol for Christians in China. “Just by his being a Christian, it is a fantastic way to broadcast the ways of Christ,” he said .

It is always interesting to watch how people resinate with great curiosity the commitment and beliefs of others. Soren Kierkegaard always was quick to point out that there are many who “flirt” with Christian beliefs and practices but who never really make a commitment. I’ve seen many so called “seekers” who are in a permanent holding pattern circling the airport but will never land. Sometimes it is appealing to watch someone who has decided to do what Kierkegaard also says is key to understanding the nature of faith. He says that faith is being willing to “take a leap into 50,000 fathoms.” Understood differently, faith involves a leap into the unknown with the trusting feelings that it will all be okay.

Luther points out that many of us needed props for our faith. However props really in his words destroy faith. So when a scientist declares something about god, or when people come back from the process of dying to say that they were floating on air, going into the next dimension but came back - this is really not what we mean when we talk about faith.

Believing, trusting, letting go of all the crutches, props and reassurances is what faith is all about. In a word, faith is trust. It’s hard to come by but for those fans of Lin and Tebow, it is very appealing. To us who believe it’s something we do every day when we let go and let God into our lives and our world. It’s not as glamorous as a jump shot for three points in the last second of a game but it does get you through the day when you seem to have run into a lot of dead ends and difficulties.

--MEH

Second Chances

Reflections on Lent

As I write this, my mind is jumping ahead to Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent. Lent to me is almost like New Year’s where you make a lot of resolutions that you hope will push you in the right direction - towards health, wellness and a deeper self realization. The text for the beginning of Lent is always about Jesus struggling with temptation in the wilderness to give up his calling and for that matter the purpose of his life. Lent can be a dramatic time in which struggle is very much a part of the season.

Actually, after seeing the movie “Descendants” I came to the realization that it is about Lent as well. George Clooney wakes up to discover his wife is dead and his two kids are living lives that he was out of touch with. For that matter, he was out of touch with the life that his wife was leading as well. Clooney is up for an Oscar, but I am told that in this role he is simply playing himself. I’m not sure, but I do think that he plays the role of a father in a wonderfully, open and non-reactive way. He eases into the discovery that he has been absent from the life his family was living and he has taken much for granted which was a mistake.

I enjoy the fact that he doesn’t give up but hangs in with his troubled children to discover what their life is all about. Because of his wife’s death, a door opens for him to rediscover what life is all about. He checked out for a long time but now he’s into the discipline and routine of what it means to be a parent. Many days parenting is not a glorious job rather it is a painfully difficult responsibility.

The reason why this movie reminds me of Lent is that George Clooney discovers that he has lacked the discipline and presence that go into being a good parent. He has been absent and has allowed his wife to handle the responsibility. He has just been the bread winner which of course accounts for something but doesn’t take the responsibility away from his role as a father.

Lent gives us second chances and challenges us to do better. It is an opportunity for repentance and forgiveness and restoration. Clooney takes advantage of the fact that he is getting a second chance. He is getting a chance to be there for his kids during a difficult time. He is getting a chance to get to know them in a way that he didn’t know before. He is getting a shot at being a real father.

What I appreciate about his role is that he takes a lot of heat from his children for being absent and distant and disconnected. When he tries to reconnect he gets hit hard with heavy and harsh criticism. But what I like the most is that he is really a non-anxious presence and doesn’t respond to his kids in the same way but rather takes the heat, listens and does not disconnect.

In fact he reconnects with a discipline he hasn’t known before namely the discipline of parenting. One of the the themes of Lent is discipline. Nothing gets done in this world without disciplined people making it happen. Back in the days of the first mayor, Richard Daly of Chicago, the slogan was “The garbage is always picked up.” It was just another way of saying that there was a discipline in running the city that you could count on and even set your clock by.

Actually when you look at your own life and try to find what you would call successes, they probably are connected to discipline. That is the seeming routine that you go through each day to hold your family together, to provide a sanctuary for your children and spouse and to develop a space where everyone can be nurtured and grow. Without discipline things just don’t happen and people can’t be counted on.

Lent asks us to take a second look at ourselves and how connected we are to the life God has given us. Over the course of the year, I’m sure we have all suffered setbacks, difficulties and loss of focus when it comes to achieving the important things that not only sustain life but enrich it. Lent is here for us to reexamine our journey, take a second look at the parts of us that are damaged and have failed. Lent is a chance to regroup, reestablish and refocus on what is important.

It is my hope that we can use Lent as an opportunity, not simply as an obligation.

--MEH

Entertaining Strangers

Reflections on Hospitality

If you go to Paris and walk around the left bank, you will discover an old somewhat dilapidated book store entitled “Shakespeare and Company.” By the way, they have a similar book store with the same name on Telegraph Avenue in Berkeley, California. The one in Paris was featured in Woody Allen’s latest movie, “Midnight in Paris.” What makes this book shop important is that it’s owner, George Whitman recently died at the age of 98. His store and his apartment above the store was a magnet for writers, poets and tourists who came to see it, perhaps before or after they visited the Cathedral of Notre Dame which it overlooks on the Seine River. If you ever walk in it, it is a bit of a mess with books stacked everywhere and narrow aisles filled with more books.

What I didn’t know is that Mr. Whitman for decades provided food and makeshift beds for young, aspiring novelists or writers. He would always let them spend a night, a week or even months among the crowded alcoves of this rather claustrophobic place that sometimes smelled of old paper. He had a wishing well at the center of the store with a sign that said: “Give what you can and take what you need.” I found this interesting because it’s not often that you find a person that can open his life, his store and even his wallet to help people. But he did reach out to many and his visitors were like a list of who’s who of the literature world. People like Henry Miller, Samuel Beckett, James Baldwin, William Burroughs, Allen Ginsberg and Lawrence Ferlingetti were often seen in his book store. Actually it was estimated that he lodged some 40,000 people over the span of time that he was the owner and proprietor of this store.

The more I thought about this, the more I was amazed because it is not often that you find people that are so hospitable in our very hostile world. Most of the time we read about hostility, not hospitality. In fact, we live in a world of terrorists, angry protestors and brutality. Nations do inflammatory things to each other, we have seen dictators fall to angry mobs, we witness enormous cruelty every day in our newspapers when we read about the epidemics of bullying and domestic violence. It is enough to make you very cynical and even fearful as more and more Americans find themselves vulnerable to angry acts which may include random killings, kidnapping and other violent crimes that make us all possible victims.

It is interesting that when you read the New Testament, Jesus’ ministry was really about hospitality. Chapter after chapter he is dining with sinners and others. Time after time he breaks bread with those who are despised by society, and are on the edge of life with no one to care for them. It is Jesus who is always inviting people into a better life of community and of relationships. It is Jesus who encourages his disciples to embrace others, not to blame them or point your finger at them.

There is a passage in the bible from the Book of Hebrews that says: “Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: For thereby some have entertained angels unawares.”

When I think back in my life, I have been enriched by those who have been welcoming and generous to me. When you are involved in various situations and you feel on the outside, you really can be encouraged by people who go out of their way to welcome you into their lives. Hospitality has a lot to do with moving outside of your comfort zone and reaching out to others. You may never know what a smile can do when it’s coupled with the words “Good Morning” or “Would you be available to come to our house for dinner this week.” I can always remember taking my children to school on the first day, they were always a bit afraid walking into a new classroom with a new teacher. A welcoming smile, a kind word and a friendly gesture can make a big difference. When you look at Christianity, it is really the story of God’s hospitality to the world. If you interpreted our faith through the eyes of Martin Luther, you see in another way God’s graciousness that is transforming and even redemptive. For us to be understood as Christians, we have to hear the words: “See how they love one another.” These are the words Tertullian noted (Apology [39.7]) in the Third Century, as spoken by some of the non-Christians of the time regarding Christian communities. The “love” they are referring to is the way in which the early Christian churches cared for each other, especially the poor.

Christian community is great, but it’s even greater to welcome those on the outside who we might not know. People come to the church as visitors. It takes some energy and even courage to walk through those strange new doors into a congregation where you don’t know anyone there. People have told me over and over again of how they were won over into our community by a person going out of their way to be welcoming. Perhaps they were entertaining angels unaware.

--MEH

Listen Mothers !!!

Advice to anyone who wants to be a good mother

Initially I was not a fan of Leonardo DiCaprio. I have never seen the classic movie “Titanic” in its entirety for many reasons, one of which is I know how it ends. However, I’ve have seen parts of the movie as I use my remote to channel surf. The scenery of the ship and the elegance of a bygone era were wonderfully recreated by director James Cameron. However, I was not sold on Leonardo DiCaprio. Sure he was young and some would say also handsome, but you have to have talent. Let me stop and just say that I was wrong – big time! He has developed into an enormous talent and great actor. I’ve seen him in “Catch me if you can”, “The Aviator”, “Blood Diamonds”, “The Departed” and the list goes on and on. He is now in a movie entitled, “J. Edgar” - a movie about J. Edgar Hoover, the once enormously powerful head of the FBI.

The interesting thing that I discovered as I was reading about him and the movie, “J. Edgar,” was that he had a very powerful mother as did J. Edgar Hoover. However, he characterized the difference between their two mothers this way:

The difference was that Hoover’s mother told him what to do and my

mother listened to me,” he said. “My mother was incredibly supportive.

She wasn’t a stage mom and really didn’t care either way if I was an actor.

She listened to this arrogant little kid saying that he wanted to be an actor

and didn’t laugh in my face.

As I read this, I thought of all of the mothers in the world who have taken their sons and daughters lives seriously and listened to them. There is no greater feeling than being heard and understood. It is my feeling that genuine love is listening to someone – paying attention. When you are listening, you are loving and when you are not listening, you are too caught up in your own life and what is happening to you. Listening to your children is not about you, it’s about supporting them in their goals and in their dreams.

“Those who have ears, let them hear!”

"It wasn't breakfast at Tiffany's but ..."

Reflections on Love and Marriage

Being a pastor for so many years, I’ve had the opportunity to marry many couples. It is actually something that I enjoy but it does give you pause to realize that when you enter into marriage, most people have no idea what they are promising. None of us have any idea about what the future will bring as we promise ourselves away to another person.

This weekend will be the last of four weddings I’ve officiated at in the last month. You do more than officiate; you meet with them several times in what I call “enrichment” not therapy. There is the rehearsal along with the wedding itself. Our weekends have been tied up totally this past month.

Recently I did a wedding at The Plaza Hotel in New York City in which we stayed overnight at The New York Athletic Club with a perfect view of Central Park. We woke up to a great day but wanted to find a place where we could have a reasonable breakfast. The Athletic Club offered a $35.00 per person brunch that we thought was more than we needed after a huge wedding the night before. We walked down 59th to Sarah Beth’s – an upscale eatery and found that they had a waiting line of at least a half of an hour for breakfast and that too would have been $35-40. The same story continued as we went to the Hyatt and then mysteriously around the corner on 6th Avenue, there was this dive called “Angela’s Deli” We walked in and were hearing orders being yelled out left and right behind the counter. I saw an empty table and told Kathy to quickly reserve it as I ordered us two omelets, coffee and a bagel, all for under $20.00. As I sat down at the table, to my left was a guy playing with his I Phone with a cigar in his mouth. Down at the other side, were a couple of runners having coffee and then sitting down next to us was an older couple. As I was eating my omelet, this talkative Italian couple asked me what I was doing here. I said that we went to a wedding in Manhattan and he said we are here today because we are married 60 years. I said 60 years, he said yeah, we thought we’d come in today and celebrate it. I said I hope you find a better place than this. I took a look at them and they didn’t look young, but they did look great. I guess marriage agreed with them and they looked like they had lots of energy. They told us that they were from Queens and took the train in for a day in Manhattan. They were so cheerful and happy that they lifted me out of my morning fog and brought a smile to my face.

The couple next to them overheard our conversation and said we’ve been married 15 years – there were smiles all around. Manhattan is a crazy place filled with lots of young, unmarried men and women and I’m sure that the statistics hold true here that more than half of marriages, end in divorce.

I still maintain that when you get married, you need a lot of things, which include patience, understanding, forgiveness, lots of love and a seatbelt because the ride may not always be smooth.

I had finished a counseling session with another young couple just before this wedding. As I always do, I asked them to write a love letter to each other and read it in my office in front of me. They did so but what I noticed was how they ended their letters. One said to the other, remember, “I love you more,” the other responded in his letter, “I love you most.” Well, I guess you can say that it sounds a little corny and that this old minister sometimes cries at weddings, but when it comes to relationships, it’s never 50%; it’s always 100%.

I wasn’t sure as I looked around this place – there was a picture of BB King, some advertisements for Broadway and a beat up menu on the wall but as I finished my coffee, I realized that I might just have had the best omelet of my life.

“Otherwise”

Reflections on gratefulness

I came across a poem by Jane Kenyon that caused me to pause and think. In our busy, rushed and hectic world, there is never enough time to think and reflect or even meditate. However, as I read this poem, I was struck by how often we take our world for granted as if it were going to be always that way.

The poem, “Otherwise” by Jane Kenyon who was the Poet Laureate of New Hampshire and the author of several books on poetry is a good example of her work which is sometimes very direct but sparse. She herself died at a rather young age of Leukemia, but not before finishing several books that give us insight into the subtle nuances of human existence. It’s even been said that a theme of faith is threaded throughout her poetry.

The following is her poem that points out the contrast of our lives:

“Otherwise”

by Jane Kenyon

I got out of bed

on two strong legs.

It might have been

otherwise.

I ate

cereal, sweet

milk, ripe, flawless

peach. It might

have been otherwise.

I took the dog uphill

to the birch wood.

All morning I did

the work I love.

At noon I lay down

with my mate. It might

have been otherwise.

We ate dinner together

at a table with silver

candlesticks. It might

have been otherwise.

I slept in a bed

in a room with paintings

on the walls, and

planned another day

just like this day.

But one day, I know,

it will be otherwise.

I like “Otherwise” because it calls us into realizations about life that we take for granted thinking as if things will be the same forever.

In another way as you look back on your life, you realize that things have changed from a wall that was built in Berlin to it’s destruction that came years later. You realize that your children have grown up or you see that you have grown older. It is a nagging contrast of the word, “Otherwise” that pushes us to appreciate the moments we have lived into meaning and the many people that decorate our life with love and friendship. The appreciation grows even more intense if you are an alert person who realizes that life is fragile and things change.

“Otherwise” forces us to take a deep look at ourselves and realize that things could have turned out differently and even far worse than we ever thought.

Regret is something that we all live with but also a feeling that we want to minimize as much as we can. It’s been said that “Hell is truth seen too late.” It is the world of “If only” that haunts us. If only I had done the right thing. If only I was there for them. If only I was a better father. It’s another way of saying that things have been “Otherwise” in our life’s journey. It’s the reality of the “Otherwise” that makes a person wake up and see that they have really messed up or missed a prime opportunity to be a better person or to help another person.

“Otherwise” is another way of saying, but for the grace of God, go I.” Christians happen to believe that grace can make a difference in our lives. That difference allows us to look at life with a thankful heart and a willingness to give back because we have been so blessed and fortunate.

Christian faith is always pointing us to gratefulness and generosity. It is always asking us to look at our mortality and the hour glass that never stops running. The faith is about gratefulness and thanksgiving because life might have turned out “Otherwise.”

As we look to Jesus, we as Christians lift up and appreciate his life, death and resurrection because it might have been “Otherwise.”

--MEH